Welcome to Read Before Burning, a monthly newsletter by psychologist Dr Ben J. Searle. Come here for simple but informative coverage of burnout-related concepts, research findings, and actionable advice – all firmly grounded in science.
Who am I? After earning a PhD in psychology, I spent 20 years in academia studying stress and burnout until I went through burnout myself. I now research, consult, and communicate about burnout and what to do about it.
The Don’ts of Burnout Disclosure
I’ve said before (and will keep on saying) that employers need to be proactive about preventing burnout. But until we’re all doing a hell of a lot better at prevention, people are going to keep burning out. And when they do, it’s important to know how to respond.
Make no mistake: it’s in everybody’s interest for employees to let you know if they are burning out. The safer they feel about disclosing this information, the earlier are likely to speak up, allowing for earlier and more effective interventions (see my November 2025 issue on early identification of burnout). The longer they stay quiet, the worse their condition is likely to become, and the more people are likely to be harmed by the burnout-causing hazards.
When someone finally has the courage to open up about feeling burned out (hardly an easy matter, as I explain in my August 2025 issue on burnout and shame), the response they get from the listener can make a huge difference. A helpful and supportive response can facilitate trust, hope, early intervention, and effective recovery. A poor response can do the opposite.
Unfortunately, a huge number of stories I’ve heard from people who have been through burnout include poor responses to their burnout disclosure.
This issue was going to be a discussion of the Do’s and Don’ts of responding to burnout disclosure, but it got too long. So I’ve cut it in half, with this issue focusing on what NOT to do when someone tells you they are burning out.
Deny
Of the many undesirable responses to burnout disclosure, this may be the most common: rejecting the discloser’s claim that they are experiencing burnout.
Sometimes this is driven by a general disbelief in burnout as a condition. More often, however, denial emerges is a form of gatekeeping: a rejection based on the discloser’s situation or symptoms failing to perfectly match the listener’s beliefs and assumptions about typical causes or consequences of burnout.
Some forms of denial may even come from good intentions. For example, if the disclosing employee previously seemed to be coping well, the listener may be motivated to reassure them by suggesting this is a more temporary phenomenon than burnout. Alternatively, the disclosing employee may describe experiences that don’t sound much like burnout, a condition that admittedly is widely misunderstood, and the listener may be trying to guide them to a more accurate diagnosis.
But whatever the rationale, it’s not appropriate to respond to someone’s disclosure of feeling burned out with denial.
Denial can send powerful messages, such as: Never share your feelings with others. If things aren’t going well, wait until they are catastrophic before telling anyone. And even then, don’t expect to be believed.
Rebuke
Arguably worse than denial is rebuking, which in this context refers to any kind of censure, criticism, or punishment. In this context, rebuking someone for disclosing burnout can be driven by factors such as:
- ignorance about burnout;
- pressure to eliminate anyone who may no longer be performing at their best;
- fear of being held accountable for the employee’s condition;
- resentment and displaced aggression (What do you mean YOU’RE burned out? Have you any idea how much tougher MY job is?).
I hope it goes without saying that, regardless of the reasons, these are terrible ways to respond to a burnout disclosure. Fortunately, Australia’s regulatory environment makes such actions difficult to defend legally.
Assume
Humans are quick to judge one another before we know the full story, which makes us likely to hear only what we want to hear. This is one of many reasons why we should let a person disclosing their experience of burnout say their piece without interruption.
Especially problematic are assumptions about the motivations for disclosure. I have heard stories about people being quizzed, mid-disclosure, about whether this is a strategy, for example to request more time off or to avoid consequences for missed deadlines.
Then there are assumptions about employee limitations. Are you managing your time badly? Do you not know your priorities? Do you find it hard to delegate? Are you a perfectionist?
One person told me she had to pause during her burnout disclosure while her boss explained that her difficulties were her own fault for not speaking up about problems sooner.
People also make assumptions about the factors that led someone to burn out. This is a better area of focus for understanding why burnout happens, but it still shouldn’t interrupt the disclosure conversation. One person told me his disclosure quickly turned into an interrogation about which members of his team weren’t pulling their weight.
Burnout disclosures should trigger prompt and thorough investigations into psychosocial hazards (see the July 2025 issue on causes of burnout). These can offer insights into what changes should be made, including which hazards need better controls. There should also be attention to which supports should be provided and which reasonable adjustments could be made to facilitate the disclosing employee’s recovery.
But there’s a time and a place to investigate these matters, and it’s not in the middle of the disclosure conversation.
Bury
Another undesirable response to burnout disclosure involves efforts to prevent the employee from making a formal report. This might involve telling the employee to wait for a few weeks to see if the situation improves, or encouraging them to attend some form of personal development, or simply advising them against telling anyone else.
As with rebukes, efforts to bury experiences of burnout can be motivated by fear — a desire to avoid consequences if the person hearing the disclosure could be held responsible for the employee’s condition. They can also be motivated by helplessness.
Where a team lacks staff or funding to cover for an employee who needs time off to recover from burnout, leaders or co-workers may pressure that employee into not reporting their condition.
In some cases, pressure to avoid reporting may even be motivated by a desire to protect the employee. Some people will discourage the disclosing employee from reporting their condition out of a belief it will harm the employee’s career. This may even have elements of truth in some organisations.
But such organisations could be breaking the law. In many countries and regulatory jurisdictions, it is not legal to discriminate against employees on mental health grounds. In any case, beliefs about the negative consequences of reporting burnout or mental illnesses are self-fulfilling prophesies at least as much as they are realistic predictions. In organisations where people are discouraged from reporting burnout, reports of burnout will necessarily be rare, fuelling isolation, stigma and shame amongst those who experience burnout (possibly also discouraging them from seeking support outside work). A culture that discourages reporting of burnout also avoids identifying and taking action against the hazards that contribute to burnout, resulting in more employees being exposed to harm.
Don’t be DRAB
Deny, Rebuke, Assume, and Bury are my top four Don’ts for responding to someone disclosing they are burning out. For my advice on what to Do instead, you’ll have to wait for another issue.
References
May, R. W., Terman, J. M., Foster, G., Seibert, G. S., & Fincham, F. D. (2020). Burnout stigma inventory: Initial development and validation in industry and academia. Frontiers in Psychology, 11, 391.
Meluch, A. L. (2023). Core and catalyst criteria for disclosing one’s burnout in the workplace. Qualitative Research Reports in Communication, 24(1), 61–67.
Wallace J. E. (2017). Mental health and stigma in the medical profession. Health: An Interdisciplinary Journal for the Social Study of Health, Illness and Medicine, 16(1), 3-18.
Wheat, K., Brohan, E., Henderson, C., & Thornicroft, G. (2010). Mental illness and the workplace: conceal or reveal? Journal of the royal society of medicine, 103(3), 83-86.
News
Coming Soon
- New episodes of the podcast Mind on the Job.
- The second report of findings from my Experiences of Burnout 2025 study (see RBB issue #06).
- Tools for managing burnout.
Monthly Updates
- Burnout symptom status: Low!
- Secret burnout book query status: [REDACTED]
- Podcast status: More episodes coming soon!
- Broken household items that somehow weren’t put out for waste collection as intended: Six.
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(c) 2026 Ben J. Searle